I know people say you are reborn when your child is born and all that... I'm sorry I do not agree with that. I didn't 'connect' instantly with Z, I took time and so did she. Of course I did do what a mom is 'supposed' to do but for me handling a small baby was more of a responsibility than anything else. You can't blame me really, the youngest baby I handled before Z was my 6 month old nephew. Z has always been closer to her dad, coz Fizzy connected with Z from the word go.
I used to crib and cry and blame myself constantly. I always wanted to be super mom and here I was clueless, tired, worried and I just wanted to run away.
I used to crib and cry and blame myself constantly. I always wanted to be super mom and here I was clueless, tired, worried and I just wanted to run away.
Thankfully, 3.5 years down the line, I can proudly say, I have developed a bond with Z which I always wanted.
There are moments when she wants just her Mum and no one else. I feel super in one of those moments. She makes me understand that no one but me is what she wants. I might have a 101 issues but she makes me believe I'm perfect and that makes me HAPPIEST.
We laugh together, we read together, we workout together, we sing together... She is my Best Friend and I'm not saying that because she is my daughter but because I'm in my best of zones when I'm Z-oned :-P
When I get dressed she becomes my stylist and tells me if I go wrong (not that I believe everything she says :-P ). We also coordinate the colour of the clothes we wear at times...
We go shopping/for coffee together, and we have a blast together.
Wherever I have reached in my career is because my family has been so understanding and Z plays a BIG ROLE in that.
And this post will be incomplete if I don't mention this - When I came back from the workshop at Z's school, I went back to pick her from school. At home she hugged me and said 'Ma, I love you'... I don't know why but she said because she loved what I did in her school and her friends said I was so nice... (well I take that as a compliment) :-D
These small moments help me stay on track and makes my belief in me as a mom, stronger.
We laugh together, we read together, we workout together, we sing together... She is my Best Friend and I'm not saying that because she is my daughter but because I'm in my best of zones when I'm Z-oned :-P
When I get dressed she becomes my stylist and tells me if I go wrong (not that I believe everything she says :-P ). We also coordinate the colour of the clothes we wear at times...
We go shopping/for coffee together, and we have a blast together.
Wherever I have reached in my career is because my family has been so understanding and Z plays a BIG ROLE in that.
And this post will be incomplete if I don't mention this - When I came back from the workshop at Z's school, I went back to pick her from school. At home she hugged me and said 'Ma, I love you'... I don't know why but she said because she loved what I did in her school and her friends said I was so nice... (well I take that as a compliment) :-D
These small moments help me stay on track and makes my belief in me as a mom, stronger.
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